I don't know what to do about this cat.

Once in September, I had just moved into my apartment and was talking to my friend Dan online one evening about how much I liked living alone. He said, "Good, just don't get cats." I said something derogatory about cats (probably "woof" because that's what I say, and it's funny because I was inevitably going to tell him next how I am a "dog person"). I then went outside to take out the trash or something. When I came back inside, there was a cat sitting in my desk chair looking at my computer, saying "Hey Dan, I am heeeeeere." I freaked out and chased it out and told Dan what had happened and I don't think he believed me.*

*The cat didn't actually talk, but I was freaked out nonetheless.

I didn't see this cat for a long time until maybe a week ago when it tried to sneak in again. Tonight I came home from a movie, and there he was sitting on my porch/stoop/landing. I don't know why he doesn't get I don't want him in my life. I want a dog right now. But no, all I have is this little feline asshole throwing himself at me. Why can't I just come home and find a nice and smart retriever waiting for me? Even a very manly pug would do.

Perhaps I am overthinking this cat's presence. Seeing it as some sort of sign and making this weird metaphor. I am not into bestiality.